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Facts About Bleach

• You can get bleach for your hair, bleach for your teeth, bleach for your toilet, bleach for your floors, and bleach for your kitchen worksurfaces, but you can’t get bleach for your dachshund. Nobody knows why.
• Sometimes, if you listen very carefully when you walk past a bleach factory, you can hear the bleach whispering sweet nothings about hydrogen peroxide.
• Female Prime Ministers do not, as is commonly supposed, cry bleach; they cry a Japanese soy-based bleach substitute.
• Cows dislike being dipped in bleach because it makes them whiffy.
• Who’s the black private dick that’s the sex machine to all the chicks? The answer, surprisingly, is bleach!
• Some home remedies call for pool water, which can be hard to find. But worry not! Just dissolve two tablespoons of bleach into a gallon of water, set it on medium heat, and pee in it. You’ll feel like you’re getting yelled at by the lifeguard in no time!
• Inferior brands of bleach will stain a black shirt white, and a white shirt black.
• What keeps the White Stripes looking their whitest? Bleach alternative, we’re sorry to say…
• Both bleach and lysol kill germs, but it’s a little known fact that when bleach and lysol are mixed together, they breed germs themselves.
• Rod Stewart bought more bleach in the 1970s than the entire Royal Family combined.